Dylan Stafford

This post is not a story. It’s a running list of things I’m grateful for in life.

December 7, 2010. Gratitude list for today:
1. Working in education at UCLA. Seeing people be students; living and learning.
2. Grass is growing back from the patch where I grew sunflower seeds this year.
3. My dad read my book Daddy Muscles last week. He’d been meaning to do it and he did it and he liked it!
4. Talking to my dad for an hour and half this weekend. The Great Conversation.
5. Beginning to wonder seriously about adoption. Marisa and I are talking about, “What do we do first.”
6. Meeting with Monsignor last week and asking if he would read Daddy Muscles. He said yes!

March 17, 2010. Gratitude list for today:

1. Crazy great California weather this week.
2. Riding my bike to work today, since Marisa was home with Jack to go to the doctor’s office.
3. Seeing Cindy get her retirement party acknowledgement and hearing all the warm words of love from friends and family.
4. ALMOST having a full Interview Team for Saturday.
5. MRs help on my team at work. She’s bringing workability to everything we’re doing.

March 16, 2010. Gratitude list for today:

1. My Landmark Invented Life Seminar. It’s supporting me getting my book completed.
2. Having a great editor for my book.
3. Getting new ideas about cover art.
4. Writing “dead sober and laughing” yesterday.
5. Hosting the largest-ever SuperSaturday this forthcoming weekend.

March 15, 2010. Gratitude list for today:

1. Glad my father is alive and kicking. He had a by-pass surgery many years ago. Every year together is a gift I wouldn’t have without modern medicine.
2. Glad my father is having a cattle round-up in central Texas today. They are working with longhorns and there was a baby calf separated from its mother this morning. He was talking to me on the cell phone while he worked it back into the corral. Modern ranching!
3. Watching my son’s Movement Class at his dayschool this morning. In the 6 weeks or so that the class has been happening, the little 2 and 3 year olds have come a long way in being able to watch and listen and follow instructions and participate.
4. Having the day off today. I’ll work Tuesday to Saturday this week, including a huge SuperSaturday of admissions interviews this weekend. Today is my day to relax and recuperate.
5. Our garden at home is doing great. I added an eggplant this weekend. Also, this morning I planted one packet of sunflower seeds. I planted them in three locations, two groups in the back yard and the rest in the front yard flower garden. I’m curious to see if they will take and do well in the soil of our home. The packet says they’re tolerant of any soil types. We’ll see.
   I found a home about half a mile from our home that has a lot of them planted in the side yard. They must be left from last year, as they are fully grown and huge.
6. Finally, I’m grateful I don’t have to be a student in school anymore. Everyone here is ramped up for finals and it reminds me of how tense I used to get, come exam time. I love takning classes now that don’t require exams and grades. I love learning, but I’m neutral on testing!

 

March 10, 2010, Wednesday. Today, I am grateful for

1. Finishing my book last night. I’m sure there is still work to do, but I completed the third revision and sent it back to my editor. My goal is to have it ready for people to buy by Father’s Day.
2. This list. I’ve not kept a daily pace, but this is still an accumulation of what I’m grateful for in 2010.
3. The challenges of my job. Lately, it feels like it is kicking my butt, and I know that feelings are not facts. I’m almost always eager to get back on campus and give it another day. I’ve had jobs that didn’t feel that way, and I’m happy that this job, challenging as it may be, is so engaging and challenging.
4. The winds we had last night. They were tremendous. I walked outside and looking up at the trees it felt like being on the bottom of the ocean, with strands of kelp swaying every which way.
5. Being able to celebrate 9 years of sobriety last week. That has been a gift. The goal is never more than today. Nothing is given about that, except the chance to humble myself and pray for strength for one more day.
6. Jackson’s parent-teacher conference yesterday. Jack is surrounded by caring and competent professionals. They got our back. They’ve got Jack’s too.
7. Sitting with Jack’s little classmates for about 10 minutes yesterday morning at drop-off. The light in the morning in his daycare comes through the east windows and gives the entire classroom an amber glow. It’s great for taking pictures because you don’t need a flash and it’s strong enough light to capture the ever-moving little boys and girls. Jack was seated at the breakfast table, served himself a half-slice of toast using the tongs, then proceeded to apply a solid half-inch of grape jelly to the entire surface of the bread.”Jackson, that’s too much jelly,” said Ian, one of the older boys and one of Jackson’s newer buddied. Jackson was so focused on balancing his jelly toast that I think he tuned out the entire room. He proceeded to gingerly eat his jelly log and when the toast was gone he lifted his white plastic plate and carefully licked clean the several dollops that had fallen off.

March 3, 2010, Wednesday. Today, I’m grateful for

1. my health.
2. waking up calm after a deep night’s sleep.
3. starting a garden this weekend.
4. Saturday’s Welcome Event with our new students. The great team who supported the event and made it happen.
5. talking to Marisa last night. How good of a listener she is.

February 8, 2010, Monday. Today, I’m grateful for

1. 45 minutes of prayer and mediation this morning.
2. waking up early, without an alarm clock.
3. this cup of coffee.
4. seeing the sunrise out the window.
5. this week coming up, and the welcome calls I get to make.
6. 3rd night in a row without cough medicine. I think I’m over that cold.

February 7, 2010, Sunday. Today, I’m grateful for

1. the sunshine being back.
2. playing “tickle monster” with Jack tonight.
3. the Sunday night speaker. “If you can’t take 7 minutes in the morning to be kind to myself, there’s nothing anyone can do for you. Actions lead to results. Pages 63, 79 and 417, plus 88 in 12 and 12.”
4. cleaning up the grill.
5. getting tickets for summer vacation handled.

February 6, 2010, Saturday. Today, I’m grateful for

1. my morning meeting. “Normally, when a group of men gather, it is for purposes of competition or destruction. This is neither.”
2. 20 minutes of quiet time this morning.
3. getting to hear FEMBA Council today.
4. getting to take a nap later.
5. first night last night without cold medicine in last week.

February 5, 2010, Friday. Today, I’m grateful for

1. Premod’s visit tonight.
2. working the full week, but without killing myself.
3. getting new admits launched yesterday.
4. lunch today with colleagues.
5. Jack talking to dad on the bluetooth in the car.

February 4, 2010, Thursday. Today, I’m grateful for

1. last night’s writing. I didn’t watch TV. Instead, I finished that idea for an essay called “Black Eyed Peace.” I may mess with it some more, but it is pretty solid and the way I like it.
2. moderating my coffee just a tad. I drink a lot of it and I’m pulling back a cup or two.
3. listening to Jim Croce video postings on YouTube last night while I was writing. Having memories of the best of my childhood.
4. having a budget. I’ve learned how to track what I have / don’t have. There is certainty around that I didn’t have before.
5. getting to create a community around the incoming class of students.

February 3, 2010, Wednesday. Today, I’m grateful for

1. continuing to get over my cold.
2. working with M. and C. today at work. We were doing something complex, with a little bit of a deadline and we got it handled, tested it, tweaked it, tested it again and rolled it out. It works.
3. tomorrow we are going to admit the first wave of new students for this year.
4. tonight, walking into Trader Joes, Jack was on my arm and he looked up and said, “Look, there’s my letter.” referrring to the “J”.
5. having him say, during our shopping trip, “Daddy, take me out of the cart. I want to walk around with you.”

February 2, 2010, Tuesday. Today, I’m grateful for

1. taking care of my health yesterday. As much as I thought I was getting better, I wasn’t. I went into work and participated in an important meeting, but then I came home and rested.
2. picking up Jack from school yesterday and seeing him having such an engaged and fun time outside with his friend Cameron.
3. dinner with Marisa and Jack last night; then reading Curious George.
4. waking up this morning and the burning, sore throat of the last four days is starting to abate.
5. having a job that is like a puzzle that I continue to get to solve.

February 1, 2010, Monday. Today, I’m grateful for

1. Jack’s school. He was happy to go in the morning and happy still when I picked him up.
2. gettting to see Jack playing with his friend Cameron. They were making “cake” out of sand in the play yard. She was making chocolate and vanilla cake, while Jack was preparing rasberry.
3. reading Curious George stories to Jack. We read two this morning and tonight we read four or maybe five.
4. Stephen King. I can’t believe there is a book of his I’ve not read, but at the airport last week I found one. “Nightmares & Dreamscapes” from 1993. A collection of short stories. Classic King.
5. getting to participate in the accreditation meeting today. Five years ago I participated and here it is, five years later.

January 31, 2010, Sunday. Today, I’m grateful for

1. rest.
2. my Sunday evening meeting.
3. free time this afternoon to edit my book.
4. Jack getting better.
5. resting.

January 30, 2010, Saturday. Today, I’m grateful for

1. seeing friends at my men’s meeting this morning.
2. resting.
3. getting 11 hours of sleep last night.
4. not having anything scheduled today.
5. taking a nap.

January 29, 2010, Friday. Today, I’m grateful for

1. our doctor. I took the day off from work to be with Jack. I took him to the doctor. He has bronchitis and we were able to get his prescription filled and he’ll get better. Even now I can hear him coughing from his bedroom.
2. cooler head prevailing. I pissed some guy off in traffic. I didn’t right-on-red fast enough for him. He honked at me then drove around me on my left and then pulled in front of me an put on his brakes. I am grateful that I let it go. I’m a husband and a father and he can be pissed all day for all I care. There is nothing I stand to gain by getting into something with a stranger in those circumstances.
3. Toyota doing their recall.
4. the neural re-wiring of this gratitude list.
5. my Friday morning call. We’ve been doing our 7:00 am call since 2004. It is a great group of friends and we support each other.

January 28, 2010, Thursday. Today, I’m grateful for

1. the chance to be a panelist at the MBA Leadership Conference.
2. the fact that we had a good audience.
3. meeting Daniel Bens on the train back to the airport.
4. my co-panelists Tony and Monica and the preparation they put into our effort.
5. having a direct flight home.
6. seeing Marisa when I got home.

January 27, 2010, Wednesday. Today, I’m grateful for

1. a safe flight to Atlanta from Los Angeles.
2. Marisa having the flexibility to stay home with Jack while he fights his cold.
3. having a wife to miss.
4. the MARTA in Atlanta.
5. how many interesting black people you see in Atlanta. It’s like it is the reverse ratio of black and white as everywhere else. Plus, people sport more style here. The style in Atlanta seems unique to the city, not a derivative. It seemed grounded in the city.

January 26, 2010. Tuesday. Today, I’m grateful for

1. older men in my life who tell me how to get a clue: my dad, Everett, Eddie. Took me to 40 to start listening, but better late than never.
2. the fact that even though my son has a fever, we have medicine and food and a roof over our heads and he will get better.
3. flying to Atlanta tomorrow. I get to be on a panel on Thursday.
4. speaking with Nancy today about the manuscript. She is making this book a real book. It is coming together.
5. knowing how to type.
6. knowing that my friend from Texas A&M, John Harlan, is working 24 hour ops to help make sure the planes can land in Haiti. Gig ’em John.

January 25, 2010. Monday. Today, I’m grateful for

1. seeing Jack in his “motion class” at his school. I had a totally unfulfilled expectation. I expected ballet or choreography and instead it was a room full of pre-schoolers going in every direction at once. It was awesome.
2. getting back in the pool. I swam 22 laps and the sunshine was magnificent. California in the winter ain’t so bad.
3. fantastic noon meeting today on campus. Smiles. Friendships. Generosity.
4. having today free.
5. reviewing the edits to my manuscript. Starting to see that this book is getting better, and getting better quickly.

January 24, 2010. Sunday. Today, I’m grateful for

1. being able to speak German. Christian and I spoke almost two hours non-stop in the front seat as we drove to Palm Desert. I rarely practice, but I can still speak German well.
2. Landmark Education. I’ve met so many amazing people, including Marisa, in those courses. It is a really a gift.
3. seeing the snow-covered mountains on the way to the desert. The sun was high and bright and the snow was brilliant in the winter air.
4. the friends with whom we share our monthly salon. They are committed leaders, interested in making a difference.
5. my Sunday evening meeting. Laughter and love and compassion.
6. my friend Neal, who is also authoring a book. Seeing his website for first time today.

January 23, 2010. Saturday. Today, I’m grateful for

1. the possibility of my wife getting pregnant again.
2. going to the gym after work today. Stationary bike + weights.
3. writing to the FEMBA Council and asking for leaders to help acclimate our new admits this year.
4. having my friend from Germany, Christian Ostermair, come to our home to visit.
5. having lived three years in Munich. That was a great life experience.

January 22, 2010. Friday. Today, I’m grateful for

1. knowing how to build websites. It’s a pain, but it is still satisfying to fix it, post it and see it.
2. twitter. I went to a cool conference today on innovation and I tweeted about it.
3. tomorrow’s bring-a-prospect lunch and all the support we get organizing it.
4. having pizza night most Friday’s. Jack asked, “Who’s that with the red hat?”  I said, “That’s Sam.” Jack said, “Red is my favorite color.” I’ve never heard Jack have a “favorite” anything before.
5. wintertime.

January 21, 2010. Thursday. Today, I’m grateful that

1. I had a day off today to make up for working last Saturday.
2. I hung out at my son’s school for an hour and a half this morning.
3. I was able to get both estimates on my banged up front bumper that got hit yesterday.
4. Marisa and I saw “Up in the Air” this afternoon. I’ve been laid off and I know what that is like. It happened to me 6 weeks after 9-11.
5. I got to go to my mens’ meeting tonight. People were laughing. They were real.

January 20, 2010. Wednesday. Today, I’m grateful

1. that we drove to and from Irvine in the heavy rain without incident.
2. that my car will be repaired that got hit at the mall today. The guy said, “Usually we don’t pay for damage on the lot, but this was clearly our fault.”
3. that we had a good turnout at our recruiting lunch.
4. that I have good relationships with my colleagues.
5. that I have an interesting day job.
6. that I got the first 47 pages of my manuscript back from my editor today. She’s making this book better!

January 19, 2010. Tuesday. Today, I’m grateful

1. for my seminar last night. It made a difference in how today was for me.
2. that we had a good faculty committee meeting today. The whole team created the input and the faculty reviewed and discussed and we came up with the output.
3. that I put some grass seeds down yesterday and that we got rain today. I’m curious to see how long it takes for the grass to come up.
4. that Jack said, “Let’s call grandma G.” tonight. It was fun to call my mom.
5. that I read my Rolling Stone cover to cover after Jack went to sleep. There’s an interview with Omar bin Laden, the son of Osama. Made me think a lot.

January 18, 2010, Rainy Monday in Los Angeles. Today I’m grateful for

1. this blog.
2. people reading my short stories.
3. the rain.
4. getting my application reading complete for Round One.
5. the almost 200 prospects I got to speak to at UCLA last Saturday.

January 17, 2010, Sunday. I’m grateful

1. that my beloved Dallas Cowboys finally made a playoff win last week, even if they lost today.
2. the my sister found all kinds of photos from our childhood to post on Facebook.
3. that I don’t have to work tomorrow on Monday.
4. that my wife and I communicate as well as we do. That she is an accomplished human being in addition to being a great partner and mother of our son.
5. that I got to live three years in Germany, and that I still keep up with friends from there. Including Helga who visited 2X last year and Christian who’s coming this weekend.

January 16, 2010, Saturday. I’m grateful for

1. Living in America.
2. Having a job I like, even if I do work Saturdays.
3. Education in my hometown of Denison, Texas.
4. My teachers in 10th grade, Mr and Mrs Terry, Biology and English respectively.
5. Growing up from age 3 to 18 in the same town. I love that solid part of my life.

January 15, 2010, Friday. This morning I’m grateful for

1. Marisa set the coffee last night so all I had to do is hit the button.
2. I got up early enough to have 20 minutes to mediate this morning. Slowed down the monkey committee in my head.
3. My invented life seminar. This is powerful, looking at the patterns of my brain. How SO much of my relationship to life is automatic. It is humbling so far.
4. Our Round One applications include a lot of inspiring stories of great applicants.
5. People are reading the blog this week. I got some nice feedback. Nancy is beginning the edits on the overall book. This is a never-done-before and I like it.

January 14, 2010, Thursday. Tonight, I’m grateful for

1. My Thursday night men’s group. I hadn’t been for over a month because of the holiday, etc. There was so much laughter tonight. Makes me a better husband, father, etc.
2. Swimming today. 3rd time this year. Back up to 20 laps. Slow, but got them done.
3. New swim goggles. They’re too tight and I need a bigger band, but they keep the water out.
4. Marisa’s lasagna tonight. Delicious.
5. I was on a conference call with our friend KT at 9 tonight from my invented life seminar. She mentioned that she had a small role on “Private Practice” tonight. Marisa and I watched the episode and saw her towards the end of the episode. These hollywood moments are still fun to me.

January 13, 2010, Wednesday. Today, I’m grateful for

1. My old roommate from Texas A&M Brady being safe over in Iraq. This is his second time over there. He went 8+ years ago, the first time we went over.
2. The rain this morning. LA is better with some rain.
3. Jack got over his cold and is almost back to normal.
4. Got all my applications read again tonight.
5. Had fun at work today. Lots of brainstorming and new activities. Cool recruiting lunch in Woodland Hills. 13 people expected, but 15 came. Plus three current student volunteers.
6. Marisa made an eggplant lasagna tonight for tomorrow. Nice.

January 12, 2010, Tuesday. Today I’m grateful that:

1. I had quiet time this morning. Was able to sit and be still for 20 minutes and then do some stretching.
2. I woke up energized and feeling healthy. Jack has been fighting a cold but so far neither Marisa nor I are getting it.
3. I picked up the phone yesterday afternoon and called my mom and told her that  was tired from managing Jack all day while he has been sick. Mom said, “It’s exhausting sometimes, being a parent. And it’s never easy when they are sick. Be grateful that he is healthy most of the time.” I’m grateful to have parents. To be on good terms with them. To hear wisdom from them when I need it.
4. universities exist. It is a cool place to go work, UCLA.
5. it is a foggy morning outside. It is more dark at this moment then it normally would be. I like it.

January 11, 2010, Monday. Today I’m grateful that:

1. I’m working Tue-Sat this month as Jack is sick and I can stay home with him today.
2. Nancy is beginning her work editing my daddy book.
3. I got through the pile of mail that’s been looking at me for the last months.
4. I’m starting to get organized on the piles in the garage. Figured out to move them off the wall so that I can use the blower to clean behind them.
5. Herb was able to babysit for Jack tonight.
6. My Landmark seminar tonight was fantastic. We’re looking at the structure of the brain, from brain stem to midbrain to neocortex. We’re distinguishing what-does-what in the sense of automaticity. When am I required in my life and when is it on automatic. So far I’m seeing lots of places where I am on automatic.

January 10, 2010, Sunday. Today I’m grateful that:

1. Marisa cooked pancakes.
2. Our friend Claudia brought her daughter Olivia over for a visit and Jack and Olivia got along well.
3. I got to go to a recovery conversation tonight.
4. It is gorgeous in southern California in January. It was today.

January 9, 2010, Saturday. Today I’m grateful that:

1. Marisa is supporting me working Tue-Sat this month.
2. Our neighbor Victoria can help take care of Jack this morning so I can go into work.
3. Marisa is jazzed about her volunteer commitment. She’s taking on a leadership role and is being recognized for it.
4. I got to speak to the FEMBA Council today. They are an amazing leadership group within the student body. The Sr. Assc. Dean was present as well as the Executive Director. Everyone getting in the room at the same time and wrestling with building the program.
5. I finished my goal for the week of 20 applications per day. I’m on track for Round One and the upcoming Faculty Committee.

January 8, 2010, Friday. Today I’m grateful that:

1. I got to have a very interesting interview today. You always learn from an interview, from either side of the table.
2. I got my 20 applications read while still at work.
3. Our meeting with ROI Works taught me a lot. I’m getting a handle on how Paid Search is distinct from Search Engine Optimization.
4. I met one-on-one with Maureen on my team. She is helping organize on many fronts and we are better for it.

January 7, 2010, Thursday. Today I’m grateful that

1. I got to swim for the second time this week. I’m slow and can tell I’ve been away. Ha, it’s not that I’m ever fast but I’m slower than my usual medium pace.
2. I was tired, especially in the afternoon. I was out too late going to see all the longhorns partying in Hollywood in anticipation of the big game.
3. I’m supposed to say I’m grateful that Texas lost to Alabama since Texas is our rival at A&M. The only thing is that when I’m outside the state my relationship to the rivalry changes somewhat. I miss home sometimes and almost any team will do. If I closed my eyes partially, I could imagine that the crimson of Alabama was actually the maroon of A&M.
4. I got all my applications read. It took me from 6pm to 10:30 and Marisa had to help me with Jack but I got them read.

January 6, 2010, Wednesday. Today I’m grateful that

1. I to to see my old roommate from the University of Chicago. Todd and his wife Lorie are in town for the national championship game.
2. I finished my apps before I drove over to Hollywood. It made me late, but I got them read.
3. I’m not bashful. I don’t know what I was thinking but I didn’t dress for Hollywood at all. I looked like a dork in a “Where the Wild Things Are” sweatshirt.
4. I got to make little videos of Jack and his buddies at school this afternoon. Since I was going to read apps at home I went to pick him up a little earlier and it was still light outside and they were jumping all around and going down the slide and then playing “bus” and “airplane” with this little steering wheel contraption they have.
5. Marisa cooked calzones tonight. She’s been experimenting with dough the last couple of months and tonight’s were the best yet.

January 5, 2010. Tuesday

1. First day back to work. Glad to have a job that I like to do.
2. Good meeting with my two bosses today, kicking off the year. Everyone upbeat and energized and full of ideas.
3. Got my gym membership renewed.
4. Had my first swim of 2010. It was slow, but it was a start.
5. Read the first 16 applications of this year’s cycle in the afternoon. Read another 6 at home in the evening. Goal is 20 per day this week.
6. Cleared out my emails in the afternoon.
7. Had dinner with Risa and Jack.

January 4, 2010. Monday

1. Took Jack to daycare today. He was reserved about going back. He clung to me and put his head in my shoulder and was quiet.
2. I’m grateful for his school. They are organized and competent and caring. It is a gift to know he is well cared for.
3. Pruned trees in the yard. Borrowed my neighbor Victoria’s recycling bin as I filled mine up.
4. Started a new seminar tonight, “An Invented Life”. In the seminar with me are two really good friends of mine. This is going to be a great conversation over the next few months.

January 3, 2010. Sunday

1. Balanced my checkbook from December. Had a little bit of money left at the end of the month if my calculation is correct.
2. Went to church with Marisa and Jack. Arnold Schwarzenegger was in the back with his two sons just as we were in the back with our one son.
3. Played in the little playground across the street after the service.
4. The Dallas Cowboys beat the Philadelphia Eagles and are going to the playoffs.
5. Had Herb and Corbel over for dinner and we made new year’s promises.

January 2, 2010. Saturday

1. Trying something new. Using the first weekend of the month to clean. Washed the car. Emptied out all the toys and left-over cheerios and every other little residue inside.
2. Fixed Marisa’s headlamp. It’s easy to do on a 98 VW. Just buy the new bulb and replace the old one.
3. Bought two boxes for the mail. One for Marisa’s and one for mine. Cleaned up that big pile in our entryway that always makes me tired when I look at it.
4. Got a yearly calendar to hang on the fridge to help us coordinate our schedules.
5. Got my shoes back from the cobbler. The sole needed to be re-glued. The guy did a good job, plus he polished the heck out of them. They look new.
6. Took Risa and Jack to “Roll & Rye” for dinner. Ate a knish, spinach. Don’t think I’ve ever had one before.
7. We ordered a piece of chocolate cake for dessert. It was huge and warm and moist and the ice cream melted into it and it was perfect.

January 1, 2010. Friday

1. Woke up sober.
2. Married to Marisa.
3. She is a good friend to her friends and that has taught me how to be a better friend to my friends.
4. Bags fly free on Southwest. We got enough toys for Jack to start his own daycare, but at least we can ship them home for free.
5. Got to get back to our own home after 16 days away.