Dylan Stafford

1-11-11

Haven’t posted since Christmas-gotta start somewhere. Christmas kicked my butt. We planned a 13 day trip to three states, Texas, Rhode Island and New Jersey. We were supposed to come home December 29, and 35 minutes before takeoff, sitting at the gate, our return was canceled. Fog in Chicago.

We were sick. We wanted to go home.

Instead, we called our friends who’d hosted us the prior night and asked if we could extend our visit until we got a return flight.

We had to wait four days to find the next open flight, since everything was still back-logged from the blizzard the week before. We ended up returning Saturday night, on the last flight out of Boston. We wet through Minneapolis (minus 100 degrees) and got back to our home in Los Angeles at 2:00am Sunday morning, or 5:00am East Coast time.

Instead of arriving Wednesday and having a four day weekend to exhale and get ready to go back to work, we got back in the wee hours Sunday morning, sick and exhausted.

I went to work Monday, then had to take the rest of the week off. By the time I saw the doctor I had sinusitis. He gave me a Z-pack prescrition and suggested rest…

So, yesterday, the second Monday of 2011, became my first day of the year. I’ve been away from work for 3 weeks basically. Everything is foreign. What are my passwords? What are my priorities? It was a bewildering day. I felt like a grade schooler who got dropped off at high school by mistake.

It will get better. It always does. I know that intellectually, but yesterday it was all gloom and doom.

I got up early today. Meditated for 40 minutes. Did some stretching. Paid some bills. Wrote a little bit. Now I gotta get a shower and get going.

Happy 2011.

Well it isn’t even Christmas anymore–we’re 25 minutes into December 26.

Marisa just went to bed after an hour sitting and talking, the best part of a great Christmas day. We’re in New Jersey, out in the country with her sister Bonnie and her husband Gary. Our son Jackson had his fourth Christmas today, but this was by far the most aware he’s ever been of Christmas. Jack powered through without a nap, and when we finally got him back home he was asleep within minutes.

We’re sleeping in cousin Connor’s room while we are guests here–Connor graciously removing himself to the basement during the visit of his Aunt Marisa and Uncle Dylan. Marisa and I share a bed and Jackson is sleeping on the floor of our room in a sleeping bag. About an hour before we woke up today Jackson was talking out loud in his sleep.

“Timmy, get back from the window,” Jack said.

I woke up at his sleep-talking, but nodded off quickly until Jack woke up for real an hour later.

“Is it light outside?” I heard Jackson asking Marisa as he walked over to the blinds and peeped outside. “It is light outside! Let’s go see if Santa left us any presents.”

Jack’s question was the start of our Christmas day–some 18 hours, many presents, too much food, one church service, two basketball games, one Yankee swap / White elephant gift exchange and a Cardiac-Cowboys-snatch-defeat-from-the-jaws-victory, ago.

“No one could have ever had a noisier Christmas.” My mother would always proclaim at the end of each Christmas as we were growing up. I could say the same for Christmas here in New Jersey with my big extended family. We have two celebrations, one Christmas eve and the second on Christmas day. They are both 20+ people affairs with huge, three-course meals that are eye-popping and mouth-watering. Appetizers are the first course and take a couple of hours. The entree comes in the middle and after that massive dessert offerings complete the meals.

I’m sleeping 12 hours a night and feel like a tired tree sloth, but hey, it takes a lot to digest 5,000+ calories a day.

My Aggie brothers are in my thoughts this week. One dear friend lost his mom–she passed three days ago. A different friend just experienced his wife giving birth to their first child, on Christmas Eve.

Tomorrow (today) at 1:30pm, Marisa and I have the honor of being godparents at the Christening of the twins of my college roommate Humberto and his wife Mariana. The twins were born on November 7, Hector and Valeria.

This is the gift of Christmas for me this year, getting to be a godparent.

When Marisa and I were talking tonight on the couch, I was saying to her that there is no way I would be asked to be a godparent if I were not married, how I am completely connected to her. I don’t have “my life” anymore, but rather, my life is all wrapped up into her life. As a married couple, we get to stand up for Humberto and Mariana tomorrow and say, “Yes, we are here for these children. We are in the background, but we are here. Their lives matter, and we are in support of Humberto and Mariana, that they can offer to their children all the love and safety and security that life has to offer. We are on that team.”

The priest today ended his Christmas sermon by saying that the world didn’t need a hero, or a king or a scientist. The world needed hope. The world needed healing. The world needed love. And that is the reason for this season.

I hope you get some moments of stillness this Christmas. I hope you hear your own heart in those moments. I was frazzled tonight after the long day. But a hour on the couch talking to Marisa and I got healed, I got restored. There will always be details, and maybe I get overwhelmed. But stepping back and seeing the big picture, that is where the healing and the hope and the love live for me.

Merry Christmas to you and yours. May 2011 bless you with dreams and work and life well lived. 

P.S.

Jack’s favorite gift: a dump truck, big and yellow.